The 'Problem' with Self-Help -
A guest column that I wrote for a friend's Blog.

If you are reading this, it is likely that you at least have at least some interest in self-improvement and personal development. The degree in which each individuals may immerse themselves in such material varies greatly. However, I believe that people such as us share a common trait of inquisitiveness. At some point, you probably began to question your life and the world around you. You may have asked yourself such questions as

“Why is my life the way it is?”…

”Is it possible that I could change any of that?”…

“Where would I begin to look for answers?”

With the current ubiquitous nature of the internet, knowledge is at your fingertips. At no previous point in history have human beings had such easy access to the entire collective knowledge of our species. Chances are that someone has thought of what you are now thinking, and if they wrote it down, chances are that you can now find it.

There is a type of person who does not even ask these questions, and accepts things as they are. No matter how dissatisfied you are with your current life situation, be grateful that you are the type of person who does look for answers. If you at the very least just have the desire to improve your life, then you are way ahead of the curve as far as I am concerned…

The knowledge is there, the knowledge is instant, and in many cases the knowledge is free. What you do with the knowledge… and whether or not you put the knowledge into action, is the other half of the equation.

You may see evidence all around you of people missing this vital half. It is this half-way commitment that lends a bad name to the field of “Self Help”. It is apparent in those who spend thousands on seminars, just to jump up and down and feel empowered for a few hours, before returning to their lives with no real change implemented. Or in those who buy a library of books and manuals, most of which gather dust on the bookshelf either unread or untested in the real world. After all is said and done, the money is spent, and the enthusiasm is lost, the self-help ‘junkie’ will move on looking for their next fix.

And in the end, perhaps you cannot control the external world, or the ultimate outcome of your fate. You can, however, control your mind and therefore the choices that you make. You can improve upon yourself and therefore have a greater influence on your circumstances.

The potential is within you to shape the world, affect others, or even just to be happy within yourself. I am confident that you, the reader, already intuitively knows this… so I will not go into the endless list of things in your life that are fully in your control and that you can begin to change today. I do, however want to tell you to hang in there. You’ve come this far in starting to ask the right questions and therefore to receive the right answers. Hopefully, you have begun to take action with the knowledge that you have discovered, or you realize that you must start doing so immediately.

You are lucky, you are extremely ahead of the curve in terms of living a great life and reaching your potential. Don’t give up on yourself, self-improvement is a lifelong process.

About Me (Vaibhav Sharma):

My personal story is that of someone who has been asking these questions since a very young age. I always had a difficult time just accepting the ‘reality’ of a dull, unfulfilling life, that the world around me tried to reinforce. I did in fact stumble into some answers, even finding early ‘self-help’ material. This was in effect was my first glimpse into the world of self-improvement. However, I was not really ‘ready’ for self-help at the time. I think that I only achieved this readiness after hitting a point where the desire to change overwhelmed me. I had finally reached a stage where I was able to leverage myself into taking action.

My turning point was when I graduated from college, and realized that I was still a child. While my peers had grown up and matured around me, I had resisted change the entire time. The concept of adulthood scared me, so I adopted a strategy of avoidance when it came to accepting the corresponding responsibility and pressure. Upon graduation, I was on my own for the first time in my life. I did not have ‘adults’ around me to look to for their decision making and their willingness to take action. I was alone, and I felt powerless… unable to build my own social or professional life. I was finally ready. I knew that I needed to take responsibility for the choices I made and the man that I was. The tools of ’self help’ where already laid out in front of me, and it was time for me to get to work.

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